Scanning the Channel Guide

Remember the TV Guide?

That was serious required reading back in my youth. There wasn’t internet. There wasn’t cable… not where I grew up anyway.

It was the bible of my viewing time. (What I recall to be) Great Interviews of assorted “famous” people who graced its glossy cover. A crossword of TV-related jetsam and flotsam out back… And of course, the seminal TV Guide Close Up break out of some must-watch show on that day.

“It’s in Close Up, it must be good!”

Now, in this modern age, where six billion channels are at my fingertips, I often find myself in a quandary. It’s like having a refrigerator full of food and lamenting, “There’s nothing to eat.”

I cruise the channel guide looking for some beacon of hope in the vast wasteland, often finding nothing. More often than not, I settle on Cops, or Jail, or Lockup.

Scanning this evening, some of the weird shit available for my viewing pleasure…

  • Local Insert Channel
  • Key Capitol Hill Hearings
  • Monster Fish
  • Woosh Beauty Premiere
  • Black Shaft Addiction 2
  • Tanned & Crammed

I ended up watching Cops…

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